Skip to main content

Your Wedding, Your Music: How I Spin a DJ Set Tailored to Your Vision

After DJ’ing weddings for many years, I’ve come to realize one simple truth: no two weddings should sound the same. Every couple has a distinct vision, every crowd brings its own energy, and the music should reflect that to create a truly one-of-a-kind celebration.

Every Wedding Deserves a Unique Soundtrack

In my early years, I leaned heavily into house music, playing what I believed were the essential underground tracks. This was based mostly on my personal curation and taste.

But over time, my philosophy evolved. I began inviting more input from couples, softening my stance on guest requests, and embracing a more collaborative, flexible approach.

That shift completely changed the way I work. And more importantly, elevated the overall vibe and enjoyment of the night for everyone involved. It helped me better deliver on the couple’s vision and ultimately create an unforgettable atmosphere.

Here’s how I craft a custom soundtrack and live DJ set for each couple’s big day.

From Rigid to Open: My Evolution as a Wedding DJ

When I first started, I believed my role was to bring my musical taste to the wedding. I wanted to introduce the audience to tracks they may have never heard before. I avoided guest requests and designed the night around my own preferences and experience.

This approach worked well for me. Guests danced, the energy was high, and I felt proud of the sets I played. As I gained more experience and insights, I realized I wanted something more.

I wanted a deeper connection to the couple and their story. I wanted the music to feel personal, not just curated.

So I began to experiment and shift my focus toward understanding and delivering the couple’s musical vision. I opened up the process by asking more thoughtful questions. I listened more attentively and invited couples to become co-creators in shaping the soundtrack for their wedding.

This transformation has made my work far more meaningful. It has made it more enjoyable and ultimately more impactful.

Step 1: Understanding the Couple’s Vision

The process begins the moment a couple reaches out. Early on, I like to understand a few key things:

  • What kind of music do you imagine for your wedding?
  • What are the demographics of your guests?
  • What kind of vibe are you going for? Elegant and romantic, energetic and wild, or something else entirely?

I gather this information through my website contact form, text messages, emails, and then a one-on-one conversation to start the planning.

Most of my clients are looking for something more modern and personal than the typical wedding format or the standard Top 100 wedding playlist. They are usually drawn to dance music, house, EDM, and popular dance tracks. That fits perfectly with what I specialize in and what I promote through my brand.

At the same time, many couples also want to create an inclusive atmosphere that brings all ages together on the dance floor. This often means blending in other genres such as top 40, 80’s, 90’s R&B and hip hop, rock-and-roll, and sing-alongs. Many of the weddings I perform include a mix of all of these styles in one DJ set.

Step 2: Creating Playlists Together

Once we’ve aligned on the overall vibe, I ask couples to create and share playlists. I encourage them to break things down by different parts of the evening:

  • Cocktail Hour
  • Dinner
  • Dancing and Late Night Dancing (if it makes sense for their timeline)

This structure helps us shape the energy of the night. We usually start with more inclusive songs to engage all generations, then build gradually into a high-energy dance party that reflects the couple’s unique style.

I also offer feedback throughout this process. I’ve done this many times and have a large collection of playlists and song ideas across a range of moods and genres. If a couple is looking for suggestions, whether it’s an entire playlist or a few songs to round out a vibe, I’m always happy to help.

But most importantly, the vision begins with them. My role is to support and enhance it wherever needed.

Step 3: Listening, Analyzing, and Preparing

About two weeks before the wedding, I ask couples to send me their playlists. I load everything into Spotify and begin listening to get a feel for:

  • Songs I already know
  • Songs that are new to me
  • The overall vibe and flow they’re aiming for

This is when I start connecting the dots. I look at how the songs fit together, which genres transition smoothly, and where I might want to add a few extra tracks to help shape and support their musical vision.

Step 4: Building the Experience and Crafting the Flow

Once I’ve listened to the playlists several times and have a clear idea of how the musical vision will come together, I load the songs into the DJ software I use.

From there, I organize the music by BPM (beats per minute) and genre, mentally mapping out potential transitions and how the energy might rise and fall throughout the night.

For the most part, I mix at a pace of about 20 songs per hour. This pace works well for several reasons. It keeps a steady flow, allowing the audience to fully enjoy each track and sing along without feeling rushed or cut-off. It also prevents the overwhelming sensation that can happen when a DJ mixes too quickly, changing songs before guests can really connect with them.

In some situations—like a one-hour festival set—it makes sense for DJs to plan every transition and song precisely. But for weddings, I don’t create a rigid setlist. I have a general direction in mind, then I let my experience guide me.

Weddings are dynamic. The real magic happens in the moment, and that’s exactly where I thrive.

Step 5: On the Night Of — Reading the Room and Embracing a Changing Dynamic

Armed with playlists, feedback, and my own intuition, I arrive ready to perform—and ready to adapt.

I usually kick off the dancing with crowd-pleasers that get guests of all ages moving. From there, I treat the dance floor like a living, breathing space. I allow the energy to fluctuate naturally while keeping the overall flow moving in the right direction.

Using thoughtful song choices and careful programming, I adjust the energy based on what I observe. Do we need to raise the intensity, dial it back, or maintain the current vibe?

Over a two to three hour dance set, we build the night toward a peak—blending genres, shifting tempos, and crafting a musical journey that feels seamless, immersive, and unforgettable.

Step 6: Embracing Requests (Within Reason)

I used to dislike requests. Now, I see them as spontaneous feedback—signals from the dance floor. I’m much more open to this input.

Of course, not every request makes the cut. Some can be distracting or off-theme. So I always prioritize the couple’s vision. I’ve written a full blog post about how to handle DJ requests.

When a request fits the vibe or brings unexpected joy, it often becomes a memorable highlight of the night.

Final Thoughts: Music with Heart and Intention

My approach to DJ’ing captures the essence of what a DJ truly is—someone who plays good music and mixes it thoughtfully to create a memorable experience. I focus on playing great songs and blending them smoothly to build a cohesive listening journey for the audience. The ultimate goal is to craft a soundtrack that reflects each couple’s unique story.

I’ve had the privilege of delivering unforgettable nights for countless couples. The feedback I hear most often in my DJ reviews is: “You brought our vision to life. People of all ages were on the dance floor. Our guests couldn’t stop raving about the music!“

That is what fuels my passion.

As a final touch, after every wedding, I take the time to create a playlist of the final DJ set. It becomes a keepsake the couple can revisit anytime they want to relive their wedding dance party.

If you’re dreaming of a wedding that sounds like you, I’d love to hear from you.

Let’s create something unforgettable together.